` THE RALLY `
Monday, April 6, 2009
Dear god, help is greatly needed again and will be appreciated. Why is it always the case of me being a punching bag? today, i was having a 38 degree fever and went to work. after wrk, i got home, slept till like 8.30pm, i woke to hear my mum and brother bickering about god knows what, as timely as it seems, my dad came home, according to my bro, it was almost ending when dad came home and mum added fuel to the already pissed dad scolding my bro. So later, all of us went to the doctor, dad asked abt pimple problem for my bro, i called home and mum picked up saying dad was asleep. so we came home with macdonalds, and walla, dad was awake. mum was crapping to me over the phone about how on saturday nite, at my great grandma's bday, my grandma said something to make my dad pissed and how all of us did not notice his facial expression where he was hurting cuz of some medical issues...so i went about trying to reconfirm it, no one saw any facial expression that shows one is hurting due to some medical issues. and i was blamed. again. well, what the fuck? i called back only to tell my father what the doctor said about my brother's pimple problem and there went my mum. she also added that we did not care about my father, so i say, why dont u stop arguing and keep quiet when dad is back since u talk about his medical condition? my mum then said that why should she giv in to my bro, he's getting worse. what, the, fuck... i did not say anything about giving in, so dont even start to accuse me... i shut the phone cuz she said that she dont want to convey the msg to dad. i msg her while on the way back saying that i never said to give in, but carry on the arguement when dad's gone.... i was replied with " ya me and my big mouth! disappointed with what is going on but 4 me, life goes on till i return home. he must learn to be smart n not b influence by bad hats!" ..... there is really no relavance.... so i replied.... "dear lord, pls help me to control my emotions andeverytime i am angry or disappointed, i will be able to take a deep breath, count to 10 and then evaluate is it worth blowing up or sayiung anything. will it change the other party's mindset if not what methods can i imply? amen" ..... back to where i was,we came home from doctors with macs, then while i was eating papaya, dad came down, i told him about what the doc said about the pimple issue my bro had.... then he ask what doc said about me, i said doc say its seasonal, i cant do anything about it, was given 2 days mc... dad told me to take a months leave , then went on to throw his temper on my bro about the lap top... after so many hours still angry.... ouch... well.... thats life.... depressing,things which cannot be control also becomes ur fault.... so how about me? where and when can i throw my temper? am i not allowed to have one? fuck this world.... the 2nd coming of jesus better be quick.........
brakes applied at |4/06/2009 09:11:00 AM|
